Been way too quiet in here

I got these in the mail today and actually laughed out loud. Warning - they are a bit dirty - what else would you expect from me?
The September 18 issue of Rolling Stone includes a cover story titled “What’s So Funny?” which includes interviews with many comedians, and includes the following favorite jokes:

Robin Williams
A guy is having sex with his wife. All of a sudden, he looks over, and there in the doorway is his son, about eight years old. Kid looks horrified, and the kid runs away. The guy says to his wife, “Well, I’d better talk to Timmy.” He puts on his clothes and goes to Timmy’s room. He opens the door, and there’s Timmy nailing Grandma. The father goes, “Oh, my God!” And the kid goes, “Not so funny when it’s your mom, is it?”

Zach Galafianakis
Guy goes to the doctor, and the doctor says, “Sir, you’ve got to stop masturbating.”
And the guy was like, “Why?”
And the doctor says, “So I can examine you.”

Sarah Silverman
Q: What did the waiter say to the table of Jewish women?
A: Is anything all right here?

Albert Brooks
St. Peter wants to take an hour off guarding the Pearly Gates, and he needs to go do something, so he asks Jesus Christ to fill in for him. And Jesus says, “I’ve never done this before.” St. Peter says, “It’s easy. Just stand here. If anybody shows up, find out who they are, look then up in the Book of Life and let ‘em in. Probably nobody will show up in the hour I’m gone anyway.” So Jesus is sitting there. An old man shows up. Jesus says, “Can I have your name?” The old man says, “I don’t remember my name.” Jesus says, “OK, where are you from?” The old guy says, “I don’t really remember.” Jesus says, “Well, gee, you’re gonna have to remember something, ‘cause I’m gonna have to look you up in the Book of Life. You don’t remember anything?” The old man says, “Well, I remember I was a carpenter. And I remember that I had a son who was known and loved throughout the world from the time he was born.” And Jesus looks at him, and a tear starts in Jesus’ eye. And he says to the old man, “Father?” And the old man says, “Pinocchio?”